About a month ago I got into a nasty fight with one of my closest sisters in christ. We spent many lunch hours praying, singing and crying. We witnessed God move in each others lives in a short amount of time and shared our most intimate fears and life challenges with one another. So as you can imagine, it caught us both off guard when we found ourselves in a heated disagreement one night. Tones were flaring and words were flying. I left feeling judged and misunderstood. And based on how I responded to her I’m assuming she left feeling attacked and disrespected. It was bad. I didn’t sleep that night.
The old me would’ve just let the friendship go and never thought about it again. But the Lord had really been moving in my heart in this season about valuing friendships and Christian sisterhood. He was teaching me how to love His daughters in a way I’d failed to in so many friendships before. I was wrecked. And the worst part was during the argument I heard Him say clearly to my heart: be kind and compassionate with one another bearing with one another in forgiveness.(Ephesians 4:32)
I ignored it because it was “HER” fault and she was misunderstanding me and I needed to get my point across. I NEEDED to. In my mind there was no way I could’ve been wrong so the only option was to prove I wasn’t- I blame law school but if I’m real, it’s one of my character flaws I battle OFTEN. (Different post for a different day) So anyways, I woke up the next morning with a heavy heart. Knowing I had possibly lost a lifelong friend over a misunderstanding. Knowing I had a chance to end the fight before it got ugly and chose myself over my friendship. And more importantly, that I failed to listen to God when He so clearly instructed me on what to do. So naturally, I apologized to her. I apologized to God and I received his mercy. And I started praying.
The enemy was clearly after our so beautifully orchestrated friendship. I prayed but I’ll be honest I really thought our friendship was over. We didn’t speak for a month. A lot had been said and feelings were really hurt. I wrote out one more prayer about a week after the incident declaring that although our friendship looked dead, the Lord would resurrect it. Using language from Ezekiel 37. And I let it be. I wasn’t sure what would happen next but I knew I needed to give the situation some time and some space.
One day out of the blue she reached out with an apology and an expression of her desire to reconcile. Tears filled my eyes. My God was showing Himself strong as my redeemer. Where I was self seeking and disobedient, Gods grace covered me. He didn’t let my human frailty and ego destroy a friendship He created.
3/4 cup steel cut oatmeal
½ cup (60 g) almonds (sliced, untoasted are great) or walnuts halves, toasted and chopped